This Tuesday was finally a day back to normal.

I was afraid of being behind on my school work.  Then I looked at things and found out I was ok.  I spent the morning getting registered for the summer session.

Afterward I went to visit my mom at the hospital after her surgery.  I was grateful to be able to do this today as in my past this would have been the sort of thing I would have neglected.

In the evening my oldest son had his biggest baseball game of the year.  Everyone on the team had been anticipating this game for some time.  The other team was undefeated and my son's team had only one loss, to them.  This was the rematch game. Unfortunately, the other team did not have enough players show up.  Today and tomorrow are the big state testing day at school and many parents did not bring their kids.  All the kids that showed up were very disappointed.

I had mixed feelings about the whole thing.  I understand the importance of testing and getting plenty of rest.  I can see how parents wouldn't want to have a game that night.  But after trying to get it rescheduled, which they did.  They should, as we did, meet their obligation to the team and show up.

It was an extremely busy Friday and Saturday and then I came down with a horrible case of food poisoning.

I got to attend my son's games on Saturday morning and then got to take the family to a park for an outing with the teammates of one of their teams.  That afternoon I got to do step work with a friend and then attend a speaker meeting.

My wife took good care of me and the kids while I was sick.  She went to mass with my son for our family.

My illness left me feeling like I had been beat up and raped by a gorilla.  This morning I was slow getting back to normal but I had to get up for the brush pick up.  I was disappointed that I never got all the new brush trimming done but I found acceptance.  I saw how I could a lot of little stuff like this to get me down.

I got to participate in my youngest son's baseball game tonight.

Thanks be to God.

I spent Thursday morning doing school work, thankfully.  I listened to Journey this morning and listened to an interview with Steve Perry.   I thought about some significant things related to desire and self-centered thinking this morning but I can't remember what they are this Friday morning as I write this.

I thought back to someone I spoke to recently who is struggling with comparing themselves to the success of others.  I thought about how I tried to encourage them but just did a superficial job by validating their feelings.  I remembered how I worked through this. I was thinking down a wrong path of thinking I worked a better spiritual program than they did but still failed.  Then I thought I would set my sights on a personal victory of working a better program than them.  I realized my wrong motives and stopped them but recognized that I had stumbled onto the solution to my problem.  I needed to focus on how well of a job I did of working my program and nothing else.  More specifically, in meetings I needed to focus on how well I carried the message.

The rest of this day I spent attending to the kids.

Thanks be to God.

This morning my wife found out my son had not done his homework and they got in an argument.  I was very disappointed because he had told me that he did it.

On my way to work a car zoomed around me.  Another car pulled out in front of me from a side street.  I thought about how these vehicles didn't gain any time advantage as we clearly were all going to stop.  I thought of my own motives when I need to get ahead of everyone in traffic.  I was glad that this has become much less prevalent in me.  I wondered if this is covetousness.  Perhaps this wanting to have what someone else has is the nature of this anxiety.  It is a form of selfishness.

I got a call from a guy who wanted me to show him where to go to an AA meeting.  He came to my house and we went to Western Trails.  It was a good meeting and I was glad I got to go.

This evening both of my sons had baseball games.  My oldest son pulled out of his batting slump and almost made a diving catch in the outfield.  Everyone cheered anyway as he stopped the batter from getting extra bases on an unlikely ball to stop.

When I got home I talked to my son about his homework and found that he didn't lie, he just missed part of it when he did the rest yesterday.  I was very relieved that he didn't lie.

Thanks be to God.

This Sunday we had planned to get an early start but we slept in.  We went to 11 am mass and my wife led the children's liturgy.  Our deacon  gave an inspirational sermon and related his story of a sudden career ending heart attack when he was at the top of his game as an airline pilot.  He told of his first steps back to a faith filled life.  His main point was about how God decides where we go and when we change direction.

After mass we came home and prepared with great anticipation to go to a baseball game.  We left with little time to spare and were well on our way when my youngest son started throwing up profusely.  He vomited all over my older son who started screaming and slid down trying to avoid it and was choking with the seatbelt around his throat.  I went into a panick as we were on the freeway with no place to stop.  I realized that I had drifted into another lane and a truck had to move to the shoulder to avoid me.  My wife and I somehow started yelling at each other and I banged my fist on the steering wheel.  In my sense of helplessness I lost control of my temper and threw our stroller onto a grass knoll.

After about 30 minutes of cleaning and calming the children down we made our way back home.  Fortunately my wife and I pulled ourselves together and made a plan for a quick cleanup and we still went to the game.  We had a great time at the game.  I almost caught a foul ball.  The guy who caught it gave it to my youngest son.  We got to see Lance Berkman hit a home run.  My other son almost got his autograph.  Our team won.

We finished the day exhausted and in good spirits.

Thanks be to God.

This morning we got up early for baseball games.  After getting ready we got rained out.  After breakfast my wife and I both had long naps.  We wondered how we would have made through two ball games and we resolved to get to bed early the next time we have a double header on tap.

In the afternoon I had to push myself to get each boy to practice baseball.  I had to do what we could in the driveway because of the wet yard.  Neither one did a lot but I was glad to get them to do something.

I was pleased today seeing the kids watching religious programming and enjoying it.

In the evening I really wanted to go shopping or to the park or something but I had an appointment to do 12 step work.  I didn't feel unpleasant about this, I just didn't want to pursue my desires.  I am grateful that God has given me a sense of constructive interest in  the work and a passion for joy in helping someone out.

I had thought about my direction in the work with the guy and had been moved to explain self-centeredness and fear in his inventory.  But, I didn't want to hold him up from reviewing his individual resentments.  When we got together he needed to talk about fear.

Their was a nice little thunderstorm during the meeting afterward.  We talked about starting on the simple terms of conception of God.

I found out that Lance Berkman will be playing in the minor league game we are going to tomorrow.

Thanks be to God.

The kids and I had quality prayer time again this morning and made it to school on time.

Today I worked on my essay again amidst many interruptions.  My wife's computer died and I had to clean it and check it out.  I wish I had finished but I must accept things as they are.

I didn't do much else.

My younger son's baseball game was cancelled.

I got to talk to a friend from the program today at the thrift store.

Thanks be to God.