This Sunday morning I woke up from a nightmare.  I was my very young self and was smoking crack.  I took a hit and then gave some to my #2 son.  After he inhaled it, I snapped to reality and went into a panic.  I wanted to suck the smoke out of him and reverse the effects.  I felt absolutely horrible, perhaps the most remorseful and painfully tragic feelings I have ever felt about myself and what I had done to him.  When I woke up, I had an incredible sense of relief and I went and hugged him tightly when he woke up.  Thanks be to God that was only a dream.

I had to rush off with my older son to his baseball tournament.  I was at once both excited and worried as I wanted to boys to win but I didn't want them to play 5 games today.  I had to ponder the wisdom and safety of this all day.  I also had to ponder the fact that we would be missing mass.  We watched it on television as we got ready.

Thankfully the team lost their first game and therefore didn't have to play anymore.

We spent the rest of the afternoon with family.

In the evening I got to go to a 12 step meeting at my home group.

Thanks be to God.