This morning in meditation I received a synopsis of the non-religious "gnosis" that is experienced in taking step 2 in AA. Being a devout Catholic I occasionally wonder about how I was able to begin the process of Theosis outside of the Church and without a clear conception of God. I know that all people have a natural capacity for communion with God just by virtue of design. I know that my religion gives me the fullness of this relationship that I would not receive otherwise. My experience was that I received enough power to get sober and achieve sanity without religion.

I tried to write this in the morning but I had to attend to some request and I wasn't able to complete it. Even now the baby just started crying in her room and I have to get up and check her. I get resentful that I can't stop for these things and I forget them. I think the idea was that since the relationship with God is a union by nature then a full understanding is not needed to make the connection to the soul.

I also contemplated the reason for praying the Hail Mary in the structure of the prayer. The first part is the Gospel narrative of the coming of Christ, "Hail Mary full of grace the LORD is with thee..." this is not meant to worship her but to declare Him; that he has come, that He is in her and she is with Him, also, to declare the Good News. The narrative leads up to the central figure of the prayer, "...the fruit of thy womb, Jesus.".

In praying the rosary the leader reads the narrative, then the congregation pray the intention of the prayer: Holy Mary, mother of God, pray for us sinners...

At about 10 am I was doing some cleaning that I haven't been able to do in forever and I found my 4 year coin from AA. I thought of how joyful I was to get it as it marked the milestone of the amount of clean time I had done when I was young. I lost the coin the day I got it and never found it again all that year. I was very disappointed. I remembered that I got the coin at the Central group and I realized that I could got to that meeting today. Finding the coin led me to remember to go to that meeting.

I went to that meeting and was grateful to finally let my friends know that I wouldn't be a regular anymore. We read from a personal story and I got to stay and hang out after the meeting.

As I was downtown I found myself feeling grateful that God gave me the opportunity to do the type of job and in the place that I always dreamed of. I was grateful also that I wasn't filled with regret and remorse as I would have been before the spiritual life.

I dropped off my friend and stopped to visit my sponsor on the way home. Later in the afternoon I went to my home group's meeting place and did some picking up.

Tonight I got to cook a fajita dinner for the family and watch a baseball game.

Thanks be to God.