This morning I got off to a good start.  The part of our parental duties that I did was shuttle the kids to camp.

Back at home after breakfast I got really tired and fell asleep.  I felt remorseful at not being more productive.   But, I did waker up and get going.  I really felt back on track today after what was a really bizarre, intense disconnection and then recovery this weekend.

I got a little resentful this afternoon as I repeatedly tried to do school work and my daughter kept interrupting me.  But I tried to trust God that what needed to get done, would get done, when it needed to get done, and I tried to think of my daughter's and wife's needs and appreciate that I get to be a part of their lives.

Right on cue an email came to my inbox granting an extension on my homework.  I got to watch an episode of Intervention and I felt another renewal of enthusiasm for participating in the recovery of others.  I realized that I had been falling into doubt, even regret, about my choice of education in addiction counseling.  On the way to pick up the kids it occurred to me that this could be for God's will and that I should ignore the apparent obstacles and trust that he will find the way in which I will apply this profession.  I also received an edification to fully commit myself to pursuing this education.

At 6:30 I made a choice to go to a meeting.  I didn't want to do this again.  My impulse was to avoid contention with my wife, I suspected she would not be enthusiastic about this.  But. I remembered my renewed commitment to help others in recovery and chose to let her own her feelings and to place my dependence on God.  She asked me to do the dishes first, so I did.

I got to go to the meeting and see people laugh, cry, stomp out angrily and share passionately about recovery.  The topic was "Rarely have we seen a person fail..." as read from the original manuscript.  I regretted that I didn't get my thoughts completed well enough to share in time.  I realized that 6 years ago just before I got sober this term, I had the experience with this reading in which I realized I was one of those "unfortunates".

Thanks be to God.

This evening