This Christmas Day my kids got me out of bed at 6:30 am to open gifts from Santa.  I was pretty exhausted from the busy day before.  But, I thoroughly enjoyed watching my children blissfully open their gifts and ooh and ahh as they did.  As this event came to a close, I caught myself feeling short tempered and irritable about the busy day ahead.  I don't remember things exactly but I know that I was not as helpful to my wife as I could have been and I griped and questioned her decision to take the trip we were embarking on.

As we drove out of Austin I struggle with waves of exhaustion that kept coming over me.  I thought about how dangerous this was and went through scenarios in my mind of falling asleep and losing control and wrecking the van with my family.  I thought about my wife's Uncle and Aunt who were killed this way in an accident with their daughters on a Holiday trip like this.  I did talk to my wife about it but she was just as exhausted (if not more so).
Fortunately I became more energized around lunch time and we stopped and had a meal and got refreshed.

While we were driving into Houston I had an interesting experience.  I noticed a vehicle on the side of the road covered in mud.  The driver was talking to a tow truck driver and a cop.  Their didn't seem to be any impropriety but I envisioned a scenario where the driver on a bender the night before drove off the road and flipped the car and then quickly left the scene to avoid arrest.  I imagined being energized from drinking and hiking to a store and then coming back the next day to get the vehicle.  I got this strange feeling of adventure about the whole thing.  It seemed odd that I would think of this as fun but I guess that was the vestiges of years of alcoholic living.

We had a great time at my wife's Aunt's home.  This was the Christmas gathering of my wife's family with her father and grandfather, uncle, and cousins.  As usual, I felt a bit awkward and imposing with my children.  But; they were well behaved and there were some other children there.  I also got to play some table tennis which was a real treat.  There was one interesting point where it looked like the only thing to drink during dinner was wine.  I found myself eager to show that I still don't drink.

My wife's Aunt's husband's yearly tradition is to say a poem that he writes before the meal.  This year his poem was very religiously oriented. It showed a degree of spirituality that I had not seem in he or his wife before.  Their house seemed to be filled with much more religious iconography that before also.

All afternoon I tried to connect with people but the doors all seemed to be closed or all we could talk about were the subjects that are 20 yards wide and one inch deep.  Then my wife's best cousin showed up, the host's son.  He is the one that is a fellow recovered addict.  He really livened up the party.  We had a great time reconnecting and he helped everyone open up and talk more.

My wife's father did not seem well.  He, like my brother, seemed to be withdrawing into his troubles more and more.  He was not very communicative and hardly engaged with anyone.  This was especially sad given that he rarely gets to see his grandchildren.  At the end of the day we found that we would not be going to visit with him and his wife whom the children consider to be their grandmother.

We took the three hour drive back home at night.  We enjoyed Christmas music and seeing the lights along the highway and in the small towns.  I got to have a great talk with my wife about our future plans.  The kids enjoyed watching movies with their uncle.

We arrived safe and sound and grateful for a blessed day.

Thanks be to God.