Last night I became engrossed in the movie "The Day The Earth Stood Still". It was weird because as much as I liked the original movie, I had no desire to see this one. I didn't want to see it because I had heard reviews about it and heard that it had a political slant that humans are ruining the planet and the alien races are here to save the earth. So I started to watch it out of curiosity about the special effects but stuck with it out of an intuition even though I wasn't impressed with the effects or the story. But, I was very surprised with the ultimate message of the movie which seemed to have been a second thought to bring some closure. I think this slipped by the reviewers as well. The moral of the story that I saw was about human nature. The scientist Barnhardt makes the case for allowing humanity to face its crises and try to rise to the occasion. Mankind lacks the will to change, Klaatu contends, but Barnhardt objects that “It’s only at the precipice that we change.” I saw this parallel to how individual get stuck in compulsive thinking and cannot change until we are forced to by the precipice. I saw this as the catalyst to willingness.

Yesterday morning a friend from the 12 step fellowship called me and asked if I wanted to help set up for the big speaker event. I had abandoned any plans to do so because my wife was off at school all day. The friend got me motivated to go there and take my picnic table and benches. I don't know if this actually helped bt it helped me to get me out of the house in the morning.

I was stuck at home all afternoon but got to go to the club for the pot luck before the meeting. I was disappointed that I couldn't stay for the speaker from Houston as my wife had to work but I realized that it would be selfish of me to resent this.

In the evening my son was afraid again and he needed me to sleep with him. I am concerned that this will become a habit that I should be correcting before it gets out of hand but I can't help thinking of when I was a young boy and I had night terrors. I also thought about how he will only be a boy for a little time and I should just enjoy this time I have with him.

This morning we made it to mass on time and in good spirits. Today was a special mass celebrating Christ The King. I was at times very proud of my children for their behavior even though they weren't perfect. I remember that I took the time to gather them and pray this morning.

My wife was gone all day at school again. By the evening I started going stir crazy and at one point was yelling too much at the kids. I was worried today about my wife and my speaking engagement tomorrow evening. I was worrying because my wife is very tense with me right now. I was also worried about not feeling prepared.

In the evening I asserted myself to go to the meeting because I was just too stir crazy. After the meeting I had a feeling that tomorrow night would be ok.

I thought about sharing my story starting with my first trip to treatment.

Thanks be to God.