This Wednesday I spent all day studying for another test.  I wished that I could have done some other school work.   I was worried about it all day and was distracted by home improvement ideas.

I was also distracted by more thoughts about the metaphor of addiction as the rapacious creditor.  I thought about the reading that says that every instinct cries out against the admission of powerlessness or of defeat.  Then it dawned on me that this is where the predatory nature of addiction is critical. Because when I was asked to turn over my will and life, every instinct cried out against that.  I need to know that the addiction will control my will it if I do not turn it over.  I must turn my instincts against the disease or I will fall right into it's trap.  But, by turning over my will I receive true freedom.

I had the notion that I should call the incommunicado sponsee again so I did so.  He was grateful for my call and confessed to a slip.  I was thankful for the opportunity to encourage him to get back on track at this critical juncture and to seek greater willingness.

I had this moment when I was walking with my son outside of his summer camp and he was telling me about his day and I was grateful for our life together.

In the evening I went to my class and the test went well although it is questionable if I passed.  I was finished earlier than expected and thought about going to a meeting but decided (or was guided) that it would be more fair to my wife to go home and help with the kids.  It proved to be the right choice.

Thanks be to God.