Friday I was having the best day ever. My son's baseball team won their game the night before and we had a really fun time riding bikes late into the evening. Enough time had past from my last trouble that I was feeling a great sense of normalcy in my life's circumstances. I was even feeling hope that soon my financial troubles would be stabilized as an announcement was made that the government rebate would be going out on monday. I got an email that the building management company was giving out tickets to a ballgame.

At noon we had a meeting at work. It was announced that we would soon be having a job duties revision and this would remove our salary ceiling. We heard that a lot of obig things were happening behind they scenes and that our business is expected to double in a year.

I left the meeting feeling even more optimistic. I read an email offering me the ballgame tickets. I got very exited about this and began to think about a great night out at the game with my son, something I can't afford right now. Then I got a notice that the offer had actually come before the meeting and I was way too late. I was very disappointed. I tried to shrug it off but I realized that I had already assumed I would get them and had placed way too much vale in this idea.

A while later I got a call to visit my boss. He said that the owner of the company was very upset with how I handled a situation that made the company look bad. I suddenly fell into a great deal of fear. A short time later I got a notice of a meeting scheduled with my boss.

I am grateful to have a way of life on which I can turn to God for courage in a time of fear because this trouble me the rest of the day and I new that I would have to go all weekend and next week before I would learn the outcome of this event.

Friday evening a guy called me to give him a ride to a meeting. I got to give him a ride and do the only part of the inventory process that was left for me to do. To turn my thoughts to someone else that I can help.

Satrday morning our baseball game was pushed back 2 hours. My son was scheduled to go to his cousin's birthday party at that time. When I called my wife she got very angry with me because I had committed to being at the game. I came home to keep my son rested and my wife told him that I didn't want to let him go to the party and she exacerbated his grief with other words. I endured i fr a while but then flew into a rage as my son's crying became wailing. I smashed and threw some things in the garage and I went for a long drive.

I managed to get him to the game and we lost.

The rest of the da I asked God to forgive me and I took a long nap and I did some yard work and played with the kids outside.

I never found time to do written inventory.

I thought about my problem at work and I began to work on accepting my situation that I might have to learn to live without that job.

This morning I was late getting up but we made it to Mass and the boys were well behaved. The Deacon gave a sermon in which he told a story about a pilot who's experience leading to good judgegent. When he was asked how he got the good experience he said by learning from my bad judgement. This provided me with the understanding I need to get through the difficulty I am facing at my job.

Today our readings contained the following statements from which I was able to solidify some ideas that I need to be able to speak about the spiritual life:

"...unclean spirits, crying out in a loud voice,
came out of many possessed people,
and many paralyzed or crippled people were cured."

This could be read to mean that many people posessed with obsessions that poisoned (unclean) their spirits came out of them and they were no longer paralyzed with fear and crippled with with guilt, remorse. and shame.

I heard today that the Bible is not a historical text but rather a theological text in which the history of a people is used to express theological teaching.

I also heard:

"Always be ready to give an explanation
to anyone who asks you for a reason for your hope,
but do it with gentleness and reverence, keeping your conscience clear,
so that, when you are maligned,
those who defame your good conduct in Christ
may themselves be put to shame."

From this I thought of how it is always my duty to learn how to speak about God's teaching in a way that does not repulse people and a way that they can understand and be open to receive It.

Our Gospel reading said:

"Jesus said to his disciples:
“If you love me, you will keep my commandments."

I realized this meant I need to make amends with my wife.

While I was typing this she came to me and made amends. I guess my job is to be loving to her now.