Saturday, April 12, 2008

This morning we went to the baseball field early. I wanted to give my son some time to watch a game before our game. We stopped at the store which was very unusual. I saw my friend, the last new guy that asked me to sponsor him and his son. I am stopping to call him now.

During our game today there were times when the coaches griped at each other. I was grateful that I have a way of life that has freed me from the need to conduct myself that way.

I am grateful that we had a great time today.

This afternoon my son and I went on a long bike ride. My son's friend went with us. We rode to a nearby school that has some long smooth sidewalks that go down a big hill to the front of the school. My son loves this place. He rode down the steepest sidewalk as fast as he could. I went down a sidewalk on the side and flew right in front of him. He got distracted by me and flew straight into the corner of a cinder block column. All I saw was his bike flip up in the air. He let out a blood curdling scream. I saw it happen in slow motion and was horrified.

As I slammed on my brakes I almost crashed myself. I braced myself for the worst. I expected the possibility of broken bones. I darted back and it was pretty bad. He had blood pouring down his faced from his head, his nose and his mouth. I imagend a shattered skull and internal bleeding. I thought of how in the movies when someone bleeds out of their mouth they die.

Fortunately it wasn't that bad. His friend saw what happened and went into shock and took off. I tried to stop him but had to attend to my son. As I comforted him and and wiped the blood and checked him I was in emotional turmoil. I felt so awful for him. Through it all he kept asking what happened to his friend.

He went to the hospital and got stitches. He didn't have a serious injury. I however am traumatized. I had to turn to God throughout this. I am grateful for his protection and his sustenance. I am ok but still processing the whole thing. I am angry at myself for not being more careful. My firend, my wife and my son told me it was not my fault. I am glad I have them to talk to.

Today I thought about the HOW, the HAC and he SAW. Honesty, Open Mindness and Willingness are often cited as the HOW of the program but I often think that you can't just make these things happen, they happen by Grace.

We need surrender, acceptance, whole heartedness.

We can use humility, ambition, and comprehension to achieve these also.

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