Today was a VERY busy day at work but I avoided any major issues, thanks be to God.

I got to go to the noon meeting. On the way there the jail shuttle bus stopped right in front of me at a street intersection. I had a moment of gratitude for a second chance in life. The only seat available was in a place where I had to read and share immediately. I got to read 2 paragraphs from page 52 including the bedevilments.

I thought about how I accepted the need for a higher power as a mental health issue. I had a disease that centered in my mind. I had never considered that this might be the value of belief in a higher power. That it might give me the basis for a spiritual life, that a spiritual life would at least improve my outlook on life and at best might improve my thinking. I always thought that belief in God was out of fear and superstition and was not relevant to my real life. I thought that if there were a reason to believe that it was only related to the afterlife.

I had problems with my decision making. I could see that if I could make better decisions then I would not have the problems that lead to my misery. Perhaps if I could follow a strict code of morals like religious people then a lot of the chaos in my life would be stopped.

Perhaps even a clear cut decision making process would end the internal strife in my mind. Perhaps a belief in God was the power that would stop the debate and rationalization that took place at the start of every thought.

The chapter We Agnostics helped me see that I needed to take a new look at my objections to faith and a higher power. I needed to re-think and re-consider all of my current beliefs starting with the practical benefits of faith.

I didn't have to fully define, explain, or comprehend the nature of God, I just needed to decide to believe.

From that time on, Jesus began to preach and say,
“Repent, for the Kingdom of heaven is at hand.”

He went around all of Galilee,
teaching in their synagogues, proclaiming the Gospel of the Kingdom,
and curing every disease and illness among the people.