This morning I of the idea of hitting bottom as the realization of the loss of sanity.

This morning the homily was about the unity of marriage in particular the harmonhy between husband and wife.  I began to think that this is the difficulty that I face in the discord between my wife and I due to our opposing temperaments and methods.

During the mass I was looking at the cross and I saw something I had never seen before.  It was the diagram of the psychic apparatus.   I saw the superego on the left and the ego-id on the right and the boundary of the concsious-subconscious across the horizon.  I saw the intellect, instinct, and intuition on the body of Christ.   The right arm was the intellect, the left hand was the intuition, and the body was the instinct. 

At mid morning and mid day I had 4 insights that I wished to record but I couldn't find a point to get to my computer.  By the late afternoon when I could I was resentful because I could only remember 3.  I griped at my son for continuously interrupting me.   I was selfish and intolerant and demanding.

I was resentful at my wife for sending me to baseball registration today and it was closed.
I was resentful at my wife for choosing to be comedic and affectionate at the worst possible moment when my team was losing the playoff game.
I was resentful at my wife when she kept calling me from the store to ask if we needed things that weren't important.

I ask God to remove my resentments.   I realize that I am setting demands that result in my resentment.  I resolve to forgive her and to be grateful.

This evening I got to go to a meeting and participate in a group conscience afterward.  These things can sometimes be so difficult in the way that people mis-communicate with each other.

The meeting was about the disease concept and psychic change again.

Thanks be to God.