This morning I went to a meeting because I would be home alone watching the kids while my wife worked.  As the meeting transpired I fell into this really strange state where everyone sounded pompous and egotistical.  I also felt this way about myself.  However everyone who spoke had helpful things to say.  It felt as if my thoughts were being influenced.

Someone shared that when they found themselves to be self-centered that they followed their sponsor's advice and thought of the things to be grateful for.  I thought of my resentment last night and how I poorly performed this and it worked.  I thought of much better it would work if I made a better effort. 

As the meeting went on I had to apply the process of recognizing a disturbance within and seeking spiritual management.  I was amazed to watch this work and at the end of the meeting I felt a complete shift of perspective to that of brotherly fellowship with those whom I had so judged.  

I ran into an old friend who needed to talk and we did.  He allowed me to work the twelfth step today.

Today my heart went out for the people of Haiti.  I saw videos about the tragedy that made the disaster very tangible.  I had the feeling that the best thing I could ever do in life is help others.  I felt a radical shift toward true altruism, something that has always eluded me.





I thought alot today of the psychic apparatus.  I thought about a lot of things and it occurred to me that I felt as if I finally remembered all the things that came to me on the night of the beginning of my spiritual awakening.  It was as if I put on the alien intelligence apparatus and knew all their secrets for a while and then it wore off and I finally have gotten to that place again through the cultivation of the spiritual life.

Today I also thought about the direction not to speak as from a spiritual hilltop and how that is about attitude not experience or knowledge.

 Thanks be to God.