This morning I was at work and I was still resentful about not getting adequate and focus for prayer, meditation and inventory due to my family responsibilities and life obstacles. A friend called me at work and I decided to take his call just to arrange a callback. He was in a very talkative mood and began to tell me about his prayer and meditation and scripture reading. He told me about how inspired he was and indicated he had spent a fair amount of time on it.

As I listened I felt my resentment grow. I thought about how his kids are older and he has more time and it just aggravated me more. I started blaming my kids that I don't have time.

At that time I asked God to remove my anger and almost simultaneously had the thought that I have a selfish expectation for prayer and meditation. I have to be responsible for making this happen but when God deems otherwise I must pray and strive for acceptance. I must resist fault-finding and resentment.

Today I got to go to the noon meeting. It was a great meeting and I got to share from an informed perspective at the end.

At work a couple of the guys have started to ask me where I go at lunch. I'm not sure whether I should tell them or not. For now I simply said that I visit a friend who works in the area.

Tonight I went to the evening meeting for an emergency group conscience to move the meeting to friday. I will now be able to serve the group again.

At the regular meeting we read the last three pages of The Family Afterwards. There was a variety of material to share on I was surprised at how much I didn't realize these pages held. But the sharing got focused on taking meds in recovery. Some poor folks rationalized taking meds. Some were just sharing they take them and they are inexperienced with how to discern whether or not to take them. Some folks with time in recovery shared that taking meds in recovery is not good sobriety.

I thought that there was a lot more better material to share on. I didn't get to share because the last three went too long.

It also occured to me that we can be self-righteous in this type of perspective just as we can with religion. That we may be speaking about what is right but with the wrong attitude it can drive away rather than attract. Not that we need to sugar coat the truth but we could do better at being objective.