Today was very busy but I continued to feel like I am progressing in the learnin gcurve of my job. At times I felt exasperated with customers who expect me to have all the answers whe all the answers are available to them i they would just look.
- inconsiderate, selfish, resentful

I heard a conversation where God was tossed in irreverantly and i felt myself get resentful and afraid that I should fix it. Later I had a small voice that said that Jesus loves the downtrodden because they are humble and willing. But the proud man's heart is too hard to be open minded.

The Spiritual Experience for me was like having my programming rewritten to become attuned to the directives of the Universe.

Sobriety was the reason I became willing but what I received was the key to the greatest life I could imagine.

The steps were like quantum shifts that combined to form the greater experience. The quanta sometimes came suddenly, the greater experience came over a longer period of time.

In the first step i had an awakening to the truth. I experienced total acceptance of my condition. The walls of denial and delusion were smashed.

In step 2 I experienced a reversal of paradigms in which reason became the construction of faith not the antithesis to it. It suddenly made more sense to believe than not to.

In step 3 I experienced power for the first time, power that removed the obsession to use.

Steps 4 through 9 got me reconnected to the stream of life and power began to flow through me.

Steps 10, 11 and 12 are where i experience growth and regeneration of the experience.

The experience happened in waves but is also something I must to keep active. It is "vital" in both the sense of "critical" and the sense of "alive".

My experience continues to be re-vitalized. Sometimes there's banging and heat and sparks fly, and clouds explode. It doesn't feel good while I'm being re-forged. But when I get through it is something new and entirely more effective.

Today I feel like God has given me everything I need, power, peace of mind and a sense of purpose. With that have come a wife, beautiful kids, great friends, and a good livelihood. The circumstances in my life are often difficult but my relationships and my acceptance are wonderful.

Oh yeah, and I don't have to shoot dope today.